OK, recent things I made funny mistakes with (my roommates and friends are keeping a list):
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
But I thought you wanted to eat a croissant (cornetto) with your coffee.
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID :
But I thought you wanted to eat a fool (cornutto) with your coffee.
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
Can you give me the peach juice (succo di pesca)? I want to make a Bellini with champagne.
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID
Can you give me the fish juice (succo di pesce)? I want to make a Bellini….
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
The name of those trees? I think they are called Ficus trees.
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID:
The name of those trees? I think they are called Fica trees (the rudest word for female anatomy in Italian) trees.
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
Excuse me waiter, but which sandwich (calzone) is the tastiest?
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID:
Excuse me waiter, but which cazzone (rudest word for male anatomy) is the tastiest?
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
The stupid mosquito is on the wall (mura) in the kitchen.
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID:
The stupid mosquito is on the donkey (mula) in the kitchen.
[I should add my roommate then exclaimed: there's a donkey in the kitchen? And I replied (thinking she meant walls and using the incorrect word again): no, in fact there are 4 donkeys in the kitchen.
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
Excuse me, but you are wrong (hai torto).
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID:
Excuse me, but you have a tortoise (hai tortugo).
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
My roommate Giova is a very generous person (magnanimo)
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID:
My roommate Giova is a very good pimp (magnaccio).
WHAT I WANTED TO SAY:
Put yourself in my clothes [shoes] (panni).
WHAT I ACTUALLY SAID:
Put yourself in my sandwiches (panini).
And things I didn't understand...the name of the political party in Italy is Forza Italia (meaning Powerful Italy). I thought people were saying Forse Italia (meaning Maybe or Perhaps Italy). And I just couldn't understand what kind of stupid slogan that was for a political party. Good grief.
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